


Honey! I Shrunk the Autobots!

by The_Sunflower_Seed



Category: Transformers (Bay Movies)
Genre: AU Miniformers, CADE!! What did you do?!, Comedy, Crack, Drabble Collection, Fluff, Fluff and Crack
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-08
Updated: 2016-09-12
Packaged: 2018-04-03 12:36:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 18,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4101187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Sunflower_Seed/pseuds/The_Sunflower_Seed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cade's invention fails and now mini Autobot's are raising hell! Rated T for safety and I do NOT own Transformers or their character's.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am getting all my fics off fanfiction on here. Still working on the drabble series but expect it to be awhile before I update. :/ I get writer's block a lot.

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback! *Jazz hands*_ **

"Ah can't belive ya went and did that!"

"Talk about the bloke who wanted a new weapon!"

"I'm surrounded by sparklings."

" _Who you calling a kid?!_ "

If you walked into the barn you wouldn't necessarily notice anything out of the ordinary. Cade always had scrap parts laying around on the floor, ceiling, and tables that were the Autobot's temporary home for the time being. Now here comes the out of place part. Tessa Yeager walked into the barn to find her father's new invention he had the Autobot's try-out.

The device was a metallic blue with a certain combination of buttons with one side a full lense. Cade dubbed it the "holoform," a device that can shrink the Autobot's down to human size and gave them a human appearence. Of course he didn't invent it by himself. Crosshairs threw out the idea as a joke one day and both Cade and Hound took it into seriousness, scavenging for scrap metal and dissecting the parts of Lockdown's Knight's Pod.

Even though Crosshairs wasn't too happy with destroying the only way to get off this mudball of a planet, he agreed to it only to have it used as a way to go on the defense if humans ever attacked them again. So far it was clear but to be on the safe side, they needed a back up plan.

Which obviously failed.

Tessa found the device on a cold, metal table; surrounded by now minisculed Drift, Crosshairs, Hound, and Bumblebee. The blonde girl covered her mouth as she watched Hound grab Crosshairs by his helm and chucked him to the other side of the table and Bumblebee circling Drift. Her blonde hair twirled round as she dashed out of the hangar like barn, across the green lawn, shouting, "DAD!!"

"What?" Cade was panicked slightly. He was too on his toes since the near execution of his light. Tessa all red in the face, dressed with short shorts and a t-shirt that raise above her stomach pointed to the barn trying to speak.

"They....they...."

"Shrunk? Honey it's supposed to happen like that."

"What?"

Brushing a dark lock of hair from his eyes, Cade began again, ignoring the hot Texas sun on his neck.

"Honey I created a holoform to make them our size and look human-"

"Dad they're tiny! They're not human looking!" To prove her father wrong, Tessa's delicate hands grabbed his thick arm and hauled him towards the barn

Meanwhile in that time period, Crosshairs had managed to get onto Hound, encircling his legs around the engineer's neck. His coattails were flapping as Hound started twirling around exclaiming, "I'm a fat ballerina that like's to shoot things and squash whatever the Pit is on my neck!" Crosshair's would laugh; until he was slammed onto his back, Hound toppling on top of him. With a groan, Crosshairs rolled out from underneath the fat slagger and threw on his goggles, battle statistics analyzing crucial weak points. With a war cry he threw himself onto a highlighted weak point. The knee joints were the old fool's weakness; before he could even reach Hound, something of glass encased around him. He deployed his chutes, avoiding serious damage from the glass as he landed on the bottom, parachute's engulfing his form.

Hound was left with Bumblebee on the table, watching as Tessa gingerly turned the jar so Crosshairs didn't fall too hard to the bottom. Drift was encased in an identical jar only temporarily until the former Con's optics found Cade's. He threw his samurai swords into the sheath's on his back and transformed to his helicopter mode, going to Cade's shoulder. After transforming and settling on his human companion's shoulder, Drift gave Bumblebee a death glare before turning to Crosshairs predicament.

"Ah'm gonna kill whoever decided to put me in a box!"

"Technically it's a jar." Cade pointed out, setting the spare jar next to the two miniscule Autobot's. Crosshairs ignored him, struggling to see, Tessa frowned and stuck her pinky inside the jar, pulling a section of parachute upwards. It seemed to help Crosshairs as he managed to disentangle himself from both parachutes. Growling, he retracted his parachutes and looked up to Tessa, waving his tiny fists.

"What's the big idea?"

"What?"

"I'm tiny!"

"I noticed." Cade deadpanned, noting that they all were as big as a travel sized shampoo bottles! This went badly oh so badly!

 


	2. Chapter 2

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback! *Salutes*_ **

* * *

Tessa groaned as she Skyped Shane. Drift, Bumblebee, and Crosshairs were in the background, messing around with whatever they got their hands on. She didn't turn around at them to send them a glare as she tried to talk to her boyfriend while Hound and her father were trying to figure out how to reverse the effects of the holoform.

"Babe, why are they bothering you so much? OH and I think Bumblebee found your "drawer.""

"Bee!" Tessa got up from her seat at the window and ran over to snatch Bee in time for him to nearly see the contents of the "drawer."

" _HEY!!!_ "

'I'll face Attinger before letting the Autobot's see what I keep around!' She slammed the white drawer shut, and put Bee next to Crosshairs (whom was on the beam of her room, happily snoozing.)

Bee let out an indignant sigh before crossing the beam. He decided to at least get on the bed. Letting out a static shriek, he threw himself off the beam, disturbing the paratrooper.

"Wye Ah outta...!" He followed the rookie, deploying his chutes, slowly falling onto the bed. He brought out his weapons and started chasing Bee all over the bed, making dents in the once stiff tight made bed. Tessa let out a groan of frustration, watching the two quarrel.

Shane seemed to be enjoying the scene and rooted, "Go Bee! Go!"

" _You're too old, old man!_ " Bumblebee let out before transforming into car mode, flying off the side of the bed, tearing it down the hallway, leaving skid marks on the hardwood.

"Ah'm not ol'!" Crosshairs followed on Bee's heels, exiting the room in his car form.

Tessa stood there not knowing if she should go after those two or to stay in the room and talk to her boyfriend. She chose her boyfriend, turning to see the blue samurai she had totally forgotten was in the room with the rest of them. Shane waved happily into the camera and Drift bowed.

"Hey Drift." Letting out a sigh of relief, Tessa crossed the room and sat in her bean bag chair, letting Drift talk to Shane. It had been a while since Shane hung around with the gang of misfits. He once in a while picked up Tessa to go out on a date (much to Cade's dismay) and sometimes Bumblebee would come over to his place to hang out. Other than that, he stayed as far away from the

"Konichiwa Shane."

"I swear you get into the Japanese culture a little too much there. If you were gay you'd remind me of the stuff called "hentai madness" or something like that."

The last sentence that flew out of Drift's mouth made everything worse.

"And you would know Japanese porn why?"

            Shane flinched from the other side of the screen, a tool falling from his hand, and Tessa's pale room seemed to become much darker as she turned to the screen. Shane was stammering trying to explain himself.

" _Oooooh! Someone just got busted!_ " Crosshairs had Bee by the scruff of his mechanical neck, the rookie kicking his legs like a child trying to escape his parent's punishment. The green paratrooper brought out his weapon and threw Bee to the ground, making the little bot walk over to the bean bag chair, looking up at Drift.

"Ah' wouldn' know' you'd look tha' stuff up there Drif'."

Shane laughed at the now sputtering Drift, whose golden face could distinguishly turn red as Crosshairs and Bumblebee snickered in the background. Tessa rolled her eyes and Shane flashed his white teeth in amusement. He angled the camera towards him now.

"I'll come over and help you out there babe give me at least ten minutes."

"Okay, love you."

"Love you too."

            The laptop went black and Tessa closed her computer, turning her attention to Drift.

"Don't worry Drift. It was just a joke." Drift still embarrassed, flew up to the beams, and settled himself there. He ignored the two cackling mechs below him and meditated, now trying to gain inner peace from the backfire statement. Bee walked over to Tessa's foot, tugging on her skirt.

" _Table for two?_ "

"Make it three, Ah' hate bein' on the ground." Crosshairs groused, folding his arms as he looked away, daring not to meet the human's kind eyes. Tessa gave a weak smile as she leaned down and wrapped her hands around the tiny forms before depositing them in her lap. Bee curled up like a cat, letting a purr escape his vocalizer while Crosshairs scrambled to the side of the bean bag. He didn't want to get involved with any affection. He was a soldier for Primus's sake! A paratrooper can only trust his parachutes and as a weapon's technician, he can only trust his fully locked and loaded weapons there was no way-

::Crosshairs, Bee, Drift. We have a slight problem.:: Hound's gruff voice came over the comm. links, still gruff and not really easy-going with the other mechs. His innards turned into a knot of defeated worry. This was going to be some extremely bad news on his part. Answering the comm. link, Bee and Drift joined him.

::What is the matter?:: Drift's soft voice came in, kind of making the situation seemingly lighten up.

:: _Yeah what's shakin' bacon?_ ::

::Shut it Bee.:: Crosshairs sneered before settling himself in for the news.

::Now that ya'll are settled in I might as well be blunt: We are going to be tiny for a very long time.::

::Doesn't seem too bad. It could've been worse.:: Drift commented. Crosshairs slammed a fist down.

::Worse? What could be worse? Us transportin' to Cybatron without even tryin' or stayin' small? Ah can't believe this!::

:: _Don't worry, be happy. Woohoo don't worry be happy._ ::

::Now calm down, Cross,:: Hound started probably looking at the holoform this instant, ::Cade and I will break this doo-hickey down to it's original parts and once we rebuild it, we can get right on back to our nomal heights or our true holoforms.::

Crosshairs hung up, growling with anger. He hated this height so much! There wasn't anything for him to do that was deemed "appropriate", the human's were trying to keep an eye on all four of them without trusting them, and of course he was right now rendered useless in case of an attack.

Tessa looked down at Crosshairs, frowning a bit before saying, "You'll be fine. We can manage without your protection. We'll get Joshua to set up some defense or something like that."

"Ah' don't trust 'im."

"Neither does my dad. At least he was nice enough to put me in college, rebuild the house and barn, and good enough to let you guys get some upgrades."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." With that subject properly dismissed, Crosshairs decided that it was getting too crowded in here and jumped down from the bean bag. Tessa made no move to stop him and quite frankly she didn't want to disturb Bee from his nap. The Autobot's did look adorable now that they were minisculed especially Bumblebee with his fluttering doorwings and his-

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!" Stuff came flying out of Tessa's closet when Crosshairs flung open the doors and was now buried in clothes, boxes, and other stuff that was previously held back in the doors. Bee was startled awake, Tessa was wondering how the hell Crosshairs was strong enough to open the doors to her closet, and Drift was looking at the scene with what anime called a sweat drop.

 


	3. Chapter 3

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback! *Swings Drift's sword*_ **

* * *

It had been an hour since Shane arrived, taking Bee as the robot to keep his eyes on while Tessa took Crosshairs. Drift was luckily left alone since he didn't usually get into stuff and was well-behaved. Right now they were in the attic, cleaning it out for an item that Hound and Cade needed.

**_As soon as Shane arrived in his little Chevy Sonic, Cade stormed out of the barn, Hound bouncing up and down on his shoulder._ **

**_"The hell are you doing here?!"_ **

**_"Relax Dad of the Year," Shane started calmly, watching as Tessa was waving for him to come inside urgently. "Tessa wants me to watch one of the Autobots since they seem to be giving her hell."_ **

**_Groaning at this information, Cade looked from Shane to Tessa and back to Shane. He opened his mouth to say something but Hound beat him to the punch._ **

**_"Good, we want you and Tessa to look for this item," he whipped out a polaroid photo of what looked like a ball with spikes on it, "this is going to help the electricity distribute itself so we won't be this size." Shane took the photograph and mentally groaned. Probably hidden in the attic that wasn't really destroyed when the government came for Cade and Tessa._ **

**_With a nod, Shane ran up to Tessa's bedroom, hearing muffled curses and shouts before entering to see Crosshairs being disentangled from a pair of Tessa's underwear. He was shouting in Cybertronian at Bee as a huge applause and cat calls blared through his vocalizer._ **

**_"Knock it off there Bee, you don't want Crosshairs to steal Drift's sword again." Shane lightly reprimanded, remembering that day oh so fondly._ **

**_Which Bee really remembered and immediately ran over to Shane, hiding behind his leg._ **

**_"Aww...you're so cute Bee!" Tessa gushed, after getting Crosshairs free from his "womanly" prison. Crosshairs grumbled and tried to shrug off the comment but it looked like he wished he had recieved one as well. Drift jumped off the beam and walked over to Crosshairs, nodding a bit at the comment._ **

**_'Are they seriously jealous Bee gets more attention than them?' Shane wondered as he gave Tessa the photo and explained it was in the house somewhere. Tessa groaned dramatically and finally answered, "Fine. Fine, let's go find this stupid thing!"_ **

**_"Cool! I'll take Bee!"_ **

**_"Looks like Ah'm paired with you Tessa." Crosshairs stated, turning his head upwards only to stare at her lacy pink underwear. His faceplates immediately turned bright red and he was giving a mix of astonishment and humiliation._ **

**_'Crud! Tha' was what tha' thin' was! An interface panel!'_ **

**_Bee pointed at Crosshairs and laughed. Tessa looked down at Crosshairs noticing where he was looking._ **

**_"You better turn your gaze somewhere else or I'll sick Shane on you!"_ **

**_"Yeah buddy," Shane smirked, "that's my job!"_ **

**_"What's your job? Giving Crosshairs an ailment or looking at Tessa while her father isn't doing so?" Drift asked, with all honesty._ **

**_"Are you serious?" Shane asked again. 'It sounded like Super Dad molests Tessa for a living. Kind of explains why she butts heads with him.'_ **

**_Drift was going to restate his question when Crosshairs butted in._ **

**_"Can we go? Ah don' like wastin' time."_ **

After that, everybody moved into the attic to look for the spiky ball which probably had no meaning to them but to Cade and Hound. Tessa couldn't clean or find anything unless there was a movie in the background. She had popped in Pirates of the Caribbean, the movie projected against a far wall where there were still Tessa's old toys and toys that were meant to be passed on to the next generation. One of them happened to be a pirate ship.

It was indeed old, never painted, and with working sails, ropes, pulleys, helm, and had a crow's nest. The Autobots were currently watching the movie, noting some things that reminded them of Crosshairs.

"You look like this Jack Sparrow, Crosshairs."

" _It's CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow!_ "

"Wot' are you all talkin' about? No way Ah could be 'im!"

"Well you do have something that represents his coat, you like to get drunk when there's spare energon around, you love to fight, and you can come up with witty things." Drift stated coolly, climbing up to the crow's nest. He didn't obstruct the view but his point was proven when Jack Sparrow came across the screen in his coat, said something witty to Will Turner, before taking something called "rum" back to him and Gibbs.

Crosshairs shook his head, knowing they were right about how he was comparable to Jack Sparrow. He flopped onto the deck of the ship, looking through the railing instead of watching the movie. That's when he spotted the spiky ball Cade wanted.

'Bah! Ah won't tell them Ah found the doo-'ickey.'

            Bee must've spotted it too because in the next moment, he was throwing his vocalizer loudly enough so Tessa and Shane could hear him over their rummaging ruckus.

" _I found it! I found it!_ " Now Crosshairs would normally let Bee tell the two humans he had found the spiky ball but right now he wasn't in the mood to give credit to someone else. He got up and pounced onto Bee, stealing a tricorn hat off a doll, and grabbed a sewing needle as a sword.

Pointing the thing at Bee, Crosshairs growled, "Walk the plank!"

" _Somebody please save me!_ " A high pitched, somewhat female voice, came through the vocalizer as Bee was backed up to the plank. Drift was watching in some disdain at his two teammates. They were acting like sparklings! Though this was getting a little bit more action then the movie itself. He watched the show below, careful not to alert the humans of what was going on.

The music in the background was enough help as the action unfolded before him. Bee jumped behind Crosshairs only to duck as the sewing needle swung for his neck. The rookie rolled out of the way but Crosshairs wasn't finished yet. He grabbed him by the doorwings and threw him onto the helm. He punched Bee in the back of the head, only to have Bee trap Crosshairs in his doorwings like a Venus fly trap.

"Ah'm not goin' down that easy!" With all the strength he could muster, Crosshairs threw Bee backwards...only to have Bee land in Shane's hands!

"What are you two doing?"

"Nothin'!"

" _He punched me!_ " Came the little whiny voice from Bee. Crosshairs rolled his optics. Tessa came over and spotted the spiky ball. Using her shirt off her jacket, she picked it up before looking at Crosshairs.

"Who do you think you are, stopping Bee from telling us where this thing was?" Immediately, Crosshairs knew Drift must've told them the story when questioned about the fight. Slowly readjusting the hat on his helm, and tucking the sewing needle in his coat, Crosshairs stated, "Ah'm Captain Jack Sparrow."

****


	4. Chapter 4

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback! *Cries over the loss of Robin Williams*_ **

* * *

Crosshairs was pissed! Why do you ask? Simple: after the fight with Bumblebee, he was "sentenced" to the accursed jar prison for the night. He watched through the clear glass as Bee snuggled with Tessa and Shane while Drift free roamed the girly bedroom. Shane was crashing with Tessa using the excuse that Crosshairs might break out of his prison and do something cruel to Bee. (Of course this is Crosshairs, so he's going to give a bit of payback!)

Cade was furious at the statement but luckily, Hound told him he'd watch Shane and Tessa, making sure they don't exchange "paint jobs." So here the grumpy old bot was sitting next to the encaged Crosshairs, watching the human youths sleeping peacefully with Bee in between them. The bot looked to the paratrooper, noticing how somber he looked.

"What's got ya all mopey there Cross? Never seen ya act like that before."

"Ah'm not mopin'!" Crosshairs snapped before looking down at his current position. "Ah' just 'ate bein' prisone' in this blasted thin'!"

"Sorry, ya got ta stay till mornin'."

Bee woke up at the conversation between the technician and the weapons specialist. They were conversing about the weapon, stuff he tuned out easily. Most of that gibberish wasn't comprehendible to him. Stretching his doorwings, he scuttled across Shane's body, earning a giggle from his sleep. Soon, Bee was at the edge of the bed, looking down at the hardwood below.

" _One for the money, two for the show, three and here I go!_ " He jumped off, landing on his feet before standing up straight and tall, looking under the bed for the samurai. No signs for him. Now the true goal for Bee to be up and about was to cause some mischief. A plan forming in his head, Bee transformed into his Camaro form and drove out of the room, trying to be a sneaky as possible.

Unaware to the scout, Drift, knew what the yellow bot was up to. From his beam, Drift was formulating a plan to teach this "child" how not to underestimate him. He scanned for something useful and decided to follow Bee. Maybe he could follow and catch him in the act? It was a better idea than sitting here and waiting for Bee to spring a trap on him. Transforming, Drift flew down to Hound and Crosshairs. At least he could warn them of Bee.

"I believe the child is trying to set up a prank for all of us. I'm going to follow him." Ok, it was half a lie, but it could happen to both Crosshairs and Hound. The two mechs looked at one another before Hound replied, "Take Crosshairs with you. At least _he_ can combat Bee's pranks."

"Fine, I have to return you to your prison before the humans awaken though." Drift thought that was even a better idea! An upperhand!

"That's fine, Ah just want ta get my 'ands on him." Drift jumped on top of the jar while Hound held the base. Crosshairs stood up and eagle spread himself; bracing himself for anything. Drift slowly undid the cap, keeping a wary eye out for Tessa or Shane to wake up. With a _pop_ the top came off and Crosshairs managed to jump out onto the nightstand, quietly jumping off the furniture with parachutes up again. Drift followed but stopped when Crosshairs wasn't descending anymore. He looked up and there he was, dangling from the corner of an open drawer.

"Seriously?" Drift hissed, transforming back to his robot mode and tugged at the parachute to give.

"Ah'm bein' cereal." was the snarky reply before Crosshairs fell with a thump onto the ground. Rubbing his aft, Crosshairs stood up and ran out of the room, Drift not too far behind while Hound grumbled about youngsters, dozing against the jar as the other two snuck downstairs.

 

It was too quiet. Bee was looking around, marvelling at the living room and kitchen. He was always too big to see inside the house. The kitchen was all home country with golden lighting and the living room had white carpetting with geometric wallpaper. There was static coming from the TV, signaling how late it was into the night. Being the only light in the room, Bee tiptoed as quietly as his systems would allow him to.

" _There's got to be something around here I can use. Kitchen...is the best...choice._ "

"Mew."

" _Huh?_ " Bee turned to face a kitten that was awakened by his systems chirring and clunking. A sweat drop appeared on Bee, remembering the information about cats on the internet. They hunted for fun! Not wasting a beat, Bee ran as fast as he could, a nursery rhyme playing through his speakers, " _Run, run as fast as you can, you can't catch me 'cause I'm the Gingerbread Man!_ "

The kitten, now fully interested, chased after the scrambling metal toy. A little tabby loved this kind of fun stuff! Which is rather unfortunate for Bee; soon he was starting to get tired and the kitten caught up, ready to punce on him. In a sheer determination, Bee turned the corner to escape the creature when he smacked into a person. Horror dawned onto the scout as the white nose and dangerously evil eyes glaring a potential hole into his soul.

" _Oooooooooooh nooooooooooooooooooooo!_ " came the squeaky voice. Crosshairs picked the little bot and pinned him against the cabinet. The little bot struggled out of fear for the kitten than the angry paratrooper.

"Aye mate, want ta play a game?"

" _How about...let's NOT GET EATEN!!!!_ "

"Huh?"

"Mrawr!" Crosshairs, Drift, and Bee turned their heads to face the dreaded kitten. The other two knew about the cat, a parting gift from Joshua to Tessa. The little furball raised a paw and started swatting at the three bots. Crosshairs threw Bee to the side and went for his sewing needle. Nothing was found, instead he whipped out a toothpick!

"Bumblebee!"

" _What? You were going to kill little old me!_ "

"MEOW!!" The kitten yelped in pain as Crosshairs stabbed the toothpick into its plush paw. The kitten backed off and ran off much to the dismay of Drift.

"You shouldn't have harmed it. Tessa will surely notice the injury."

"Well if ya planned to become a chewy toy, Ah'd say you should thank meh."

The lights flicked on and there was Shane holding the injured kitten and Tessa with her hands on her hips, glowering down at the three. All they could offer was sheepish grins before you could hear three screams echo in the hot night.

Now the daylight is on and....

"AH! This is degrading!" Hound yelled indignantly, as burning hair and newspaper was dumped into his jar. All four Autobots were trapped in seperate jars, each serving terms in their prison for different reasons with the hair burning dumped into their jars for extra measures. The sentence and times of the serving were printed on the notecards attached to the jars.

Hound: let Crosshairs escape and didn't watch Tessa nor Shane. Duration: 3 hours

Crosshairs: Withheld information, beat Bee, escaped, and stabbed Toodles. Duration: 24 hours

Bumblebee: Fought with Crosshairs and snuck out. Duration: 2 hours

Drift: An accomplice to Crosshairs escape. Duration: 1 hour

None of them were pleased. Drift looked up from his meditation pose and narrowed his optics at Shane.

"You dishonor me greatly!"

" _Dishonor on you,_ " Bee pointed at Shane and then towards Tessa. " _Dishonor on your cow!_ "

::Bee, you shouldn't have done that!:: Hound bellowed as Tessa smiled evilly.

"Since Bee decided to call me a cow," Tessa walked over to Bee's notecard and changed the duration to four hours. "I'll just do this!" She grabbed a heavy blanket and draped it over the jars, blocking all the sunlight out. Leaving them in stale burnt hair jars.

::Told ya so.::

:: _Shut up!_ ::


	5. Chapter 5

**Splish splash I was takin' a bath 'Long about a Saturday night (yeah!) Rub dub Just relaxin' in the tub Thinkin' everything was all right Well, I stepped out the tub Put my feet on the floor I wrapped the towel around me And I opened the door And then a Splish, splash I jumped back in the bath Well, how was I to know There was a party goin' on**

* * *

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback! *Puts on a fumigation helmet*_ **

* * *

It had been at least a day and a half before Crosshairs was let out. The paratrooper was none too pleased of bathing in the scent of burnt hair; while the others got off with lesser sentences than he. He was currently sitting on the bathroom counter next to Hound, Bee, and Drift. Apparently they weren't permitted to be washed of their new "perfume" until Crosshairs served his sentence. The bathtub was currently being filled; not too deep but not too full. There was bubbles in there, they looked harmless enough.

'At least it'd be better than the time Ah was dangled over a vat of slag.' Shane walked over to the four bots and flopped down on the toliet, rolling his eyes.

"I don't know what to tell you. That you are probably going to be man-handled during the wash or the polishing is going to be the worst thing in the world."

"We've been through worse." Drift replied, meditating as he patiently awaited for Tessa. Hound snorted, "Yeah we've been hunted by you guys, remember?"

"Yeah that does sound worse than a man handled bath."

" _You bet your ass it is!_ "

"You know Tessa didn't forget about the "cow" comment?"

Bee immediately screeched as Tessa snatched up the flailing Autobot and he shrieked as Tessa plunged him into the cold water. He flailed his arms as though he were drowning.

"Oh cool it Bee. Think of it as payback."

" _Payback is a bitch!_ "

"Yeah but it's my payback!" Bee squealed some more as he was rinsed off under the cold faucet before dumped into the warm bathtub, folding his arms, and pouting at the rough treatment. At least the water was warmer. Testing his doorwings, it felt nice to have his hinges feel like new, all the tension get off his ba-

"HAHAHA!!" Crosshairs launched himself on to Bee, forcing the little robot to go underwater. It didn't hurt but his intakes did not enjoy the soapy water taste. He came up and "coughed", trying to get rid of that taste. Hound and Drift jumped in besides Crosshairs, Drift taking hold of Crosshairs while Hound took Bee. They all didn't want to get stuck in those stinky jars again.

" _Let me at 'im! Let me at 'im!_ " Bee was throwing invisible punches at Crosshairs, Hound restrainging the rookie and Drift doing the same to Crosshairs.

"Brin' it small fry!"

" _Oh it's on now!!_ " Hound rolled his eyes at the threat, deciding enough was enough. He got in front of Bee and fire carried him to the more shallower end of the tub, Bee kicking and punching the older mechs back the whole way.

" _This is mutiny!_ "

"Can it!" Hound threw Bee into the shallow end, a clunk making ripples around the tub. Drift escorted Crosshairs to the deeper end. Bee started swimming circles around Hound, bored that nothing was going to happen.

"Meow!"

All the bots looked up to find Toodles with a damaged paw, smacking the water timidly. Bee hid behind Hound and shook.

" _I-it's b-back!!_ " Toodles looked at Bee and purred, trying to reach him but didn't want to get wet. Shane grabbed a wash cloth and dipped it into the water before pushing Toodles out of the way.

"Come here Bee."

" _No!_ "

"Seriously Bee? Act your age!"

" _How can I act my age when I just turned my age?_ "

Shane snatched Bee up and washed him kind of roughly earning squeaks and blushing faceplates. Crosshairs laughed at the blushing, knowing Bee liked it via interfacing. Drift smacked Crosshairs and all he could offer was a sheepish grin. The relationship between those two were confusing but yet understandable. War made stuff happen and happen it did.

"Alright Crosshairs, time for you to get clean." Tessa muttered, grabbing a washcloth and reached for him. Crosshairs grabbed the washcloth out of the girl's hand and cleaned himself with some help from Drift.

'No way Ah'm being handled by a woman, especially human.' Tessa shrugged and Bee was dumped on his ass, Shane handing the washcloth to Hound. Better leave it to the bots.


	6. Chapter 6

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/IMAGINATION *Jumps on a surfboard*_ **

* * *

Crosshairs, Drift, and Bee were running around outside. Hound had to go back to work on the holoform with Cade, Tessa, and Shane tailing them.

" _This sucks._ " Bee whined, sitting under the massive tree. Drift was on the tallest part of the tree and Crosshairs was somewhere out in the fields. It was so hot outside! How can humans tolerate such heat? He was dying out here!!! Drift wasn't faring any better, actually he wasn't meditating, he was laying in the cool shade, body shaking uncontrollably at the intesne heat. Back on Cybertron, his triple-changer form made him sensitive to heat and the temperature rarely changed. Here it changed dramatically; the heat was overtaxing on his systems, inducing a human sickness called, "heat stroke."

Plating shaking, Drift tried to focus on something, his optics fading in and out of an uncomfortable stasis lock. The last thing he truly remembered was his body shifting off to the side.

"Oi, Drift? You okay mate?" He opened his optics to see Crosshairs towering over him with Bee idly playing around with a _MASSIVE_ sunflower. Drift tried to speak, only static coming out. His optics were working thank Primus but that terrible heat was making him extremely ill. Crosshairs, picked one of Drift's arms up and wrapped it around his neck before supporting Drift. He tilted his head towards the direction of Bee was walking in, dragging the sunflower behind him.

"Ah think you're goin' to love this!" Drift offered a weak nod, trying to walk as quick as he could to meet Crosshairs brisk and excited pace. It wasn't really working, he had jelly legs, making him clumsy. With a roll of the shiny blue optics, Crosshairs literally swept Drift off his feet and bridal carried him to the mystery destination.

"Hey!"

"You're going too slow in this Primus-damned heat!"

" _Here comes the bride! All dressed in white-_ "

"Ya better shut your vocaliza' before Ah come ova' and rip it out!"

" _You're no fun..._ "

Drift just groaned and was put into an uneasy recharge, focusing on the footsteps crunching through the dried out grass. Bee dragged his sunflower behind him, spotting the edge of the Yeager's property where there was a oasis from the forest. With a squeal Bee ran towards the sanction that was glaring at them straight in the face when his foot slipped and...

SPLASH!!!

Sputtering and fake choking echoed from Bee as he sturggled to get back on his side of this seemingly huge river. A splash emanated from Bee's side before there were servos on his waist, holding the rookie from sinking to the bottom of this canal.

"Ah got ta do everthin' around here!" Crosshairs growled, hoisting Bee up to the edge of the canal. Bee got a hold of a root and pulled himself out before throwing the root to Crosshairs, whom followed him. Drift was taking refuge in a makeshift boat; a coffee pot with some leaves on the side and a wooden spoon acting as the rudder.

He was currently curled at the bottom, staring at the murky water. Little parasites and an occasional fish was so unique, he weakly smiled as an ugly fish kind of stopped and was opening and closing its mouth.

'This planet is interesting.'

The coffe pot slightly shifted, as Bumblebee clamored in, flexing his doorwings to grab the coolness of the pot.

'At least he is courteous enough to leave me alone.' Drift thought as he closed his optics and let his body soak in the coolness, feeling Crosshairs circle the rim of the pot and start steering the makeshift boat over to the oasis. For humans, we could definitely jump over the "river" but for the miniscule bots, it took them at least fifteen minutes to reach the side.

All silence was present during that time, the only noise as was the creaking of the rudder before the coffee...ahem..."boat" hit the other side, jolting Drift and getting a childish scream from Bee. A lasso was seen being thrown at a heavy log that had a small branch protruding from it. Crosshairs didn't earn his name for nothing; with good accuracy, he got the lasso around the branch and pulled tight, stopping the boat from floating down the stream. Bee immediately jumped out, running for the much cooler shade, hiding in a hole under the tree.

Drift was slower only because the heat had screwed up his systems a bit. Offering a hand, Crosshairs crouched down and grabbed the samurai's outstretched hand. With a heave, Drift clambered out and jumped down from the boat, making it over to a small pond, laying against a fallen branch. It was a lot better here than over at the Yeager's Farm. He watched Crosshairs make his way over to the pond, not going to sit by him.

'I hope it isn't one of his "inventions."' Actually, Crosshairs pulled out what looked like a toy canoe, and picking up a stick, before hopping in and pushing off. He was re-enacting a gondola movement, using the stick to manuever around the pond. It looked like Bee wanted a piece of the action too as he walked over and waved his arms frantically.

Crosshairs smiled and pushed over to him.

"Where is your destination?"

" _To the Mississippi where we bought the land from Napoleon._ " Looking up the adventure, it was called the Exploration of Lewis and Clark where they travelled the vast wilderness from the purchase and with the guide named Sacagawea. Crosshairs smirked and said, "Climb on there Lawrence, we are goin' to go explore the wilderness."

" _Affirmative!_ " With that they pushed off and their imagination took over.

**_They could see the spooky forests with unknown inhabitants. Taking a glimpse back, he saw Bee in his fur clothes including a raccoon hat. He looked down and snarled to find such formal clothing on himself. The noises were getting on their nerves as there was crashing of leaves. Finally, a figure came to the edge of the river all dressed in those Injun clothes. Sacagawea, the most rumored Indian to have great beauty. The gold face raised a questioning optic ridge as Crosshairs guided the boat to the edge of the pond._ **

**_"Want to be our guide?"_ **

**_"And why should I?"_ **

" _Because you know it's fun_."

"Fine."

**_In climbed Drift as he settled himself in the middle of the canoe, Crosshairs taking the front paddle and Bee taking the rear paddle. Onwards they continued, watching as fur posts were passed with great speed on the river. Watching exotic animals drink from the river, changing landscapes, and even other Indian tribes that stared at these strangers with great interest. Soon, they listened to the pleasant noisesof the wind blowing through the trees, the crickets, and the-_ **

"Guys?! Where are you?"

"Bee!"

"Crosshairs?"

"Drift?"

**_Bee stood up in the canoe, listening to the familiar names that are being screamed. He wasn't watching his footing and suddenly the boat threw everyone into the very currents of the river._ **

"AGH!! Bee!" Drift yelped indignantly as Bee flailed like a maniac, not liking the murky water seeping into his wires while Crosshairs surfaced with a lily pad acting as a hat, spitting a stream of water back into the pond.

" _Medae! Medae!_ "

"There you guys are!" Cade exclaimed, coming upon the three bots who had capsized. He held back a snicker but smiled as he jumped over the river with Tessa and Shane following him. Hound was still at the barn fixing the holoform. Shane sighed as he scooped the writhing Bee out of the water.

"Bee! I just washed you!"

" _I'm sorry daddy._ " Bee admitted, bowing his head. Cade scooped up Drift who didn't look pleased at being capsized into the water. He let him sit on his shoulder, not happy with the stench but happy nobody saw them. Tessa fished out Crosshairs, gently removing the lilypad from his head. He was looking down feeling down now. It was hard to figure out why but he just felt sad so suddenly. Tessa saw he didn't want his feelings pointed out so she cupped him in her hands, a makeshift hug for him. Stunned, Crosshairs allowed himself to hug the hand back.

It felt weird to recieve any affection but it was a good weird.

"Let's go rewash them." Tessa said to Shane who was currently trying to wipe as much mud off Bee with his thumb. All three bots looked to one another with wide optics and thought the same thing, 'SLAG!'


	7. Chapter 7

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback *Chucks a textbook out the window!*_ **

* * *

Tessa was getting a migraine. I mean sure college is important but seriously, why is studying so hard? This college test had to be on history she knew since the third grade, all about the Revolutionary War.

'I wish I could watch a video on this. This would go much quicker!' She banged her head repeatedly against the pages of the book, getting weird looks from the four bots currently residing on the other side of the desk.

After Crosshairs, Drift, and Bee were washed, Tessa threatened to cut their interface parts off with a butter knife if they didn't behave. The three sat and waited for night to come, so they could sneak off and maybe torment Toodles some more. A couple hours later, Cade deposited Hound on the desk next to them and ordered Shane to get out of the house.

Needless to say, it didn't end pretty. They watched as Shane limped off as though there was something shoved up his ass accompanied by the shout, "If I see you try that again I'm going to shove my foot up your ass so far you'll taste my toes till Christmas!"

Under the impression nobody wants to get permanently damaged or interface equipment removed, they stayed silent and still. Even now with Tessa banging her head in the textbook.

::Oi! Remind me not to surf the internet for awhile.:: Crosshairs commed, not wanting to pull attention to himself or any other bot. The rest followed him, watching Tessa with great worry and confusion.

::Is this normal for humans?:: Drift asked.

:: _Get out, Get out of my head!_ ::

::Then get off the comm. links Bee!:: Hound stated, smacking the youngest bot. Bee indignantly squeaked rubbing the back of his head before glancing at Tessa. She seemed exhausted and not to mention stressed. The scout looked around the pale room and would give anything to go to a drive-in that one time Sam took him and Carly before...

That's it!

:: _Guys, let's...have a...drive in!_ ::

::A what?:: Hound questioned, Drift scooting closer to a pencil holder, trying not to get involved with a potential fight. Crosshairs smiled and explained, ::A drive-in is where humans are in their vehicles an' watch a movie all nigh'! Ah'm in! Beats a head bangin' human.:: He jabbed a finger over to the now stilled Tessa. With silent like grace, Crosshairs and Drift jumped off the table, already deciding to be the ones who grabbed the projector while Hound and Bee snuck downstairs to steal some goodies.

This was _somewhat_ working. Crosshairs was trying desperately to relieve his weight as he hung onto the grappled projector as Drift lowered himself towards the ground in his helicopter mode. Drift was groaning and the cable was straining which if it broke and snapped back, meant a sore aft for at least a month. The helicopter lowered down to the ground, the projector slightly grazing the ground.

You're wondering why Drift didn't use his optics as a projector?

Here's the reason: he hated the experience. To him he was practically in the movie or memory file. It wasn't an enjoyable experience watching people die or be in the middle of an obnoxious conversation. It should be fun just not enjoyable.

Crosshairs deciding the ground was close enough to jump, deployed his chutes and jumped. Guess what he forgot? The cable holding the projector.

There he was now dangling by his weight, lips kissing feet. Spinning around uncontrollably, Crosshairs could do nothing but spat curses, jibberish, and other stuff not pleasant to any ears; Cybertronian or otherwise.

"I HOPE PRIMUS IS PLEASURING HIMSELF WITH A PLEASUREBOT FOR FUN INSTEAD OF TORMENTING ME!!!!!"

"Be quiet Crosshairs!" Drift hissed as he too started spinning out of control. They floated towards the tree that was located next to the barn. Everybody didn't seem to notice them until...

CRASH!

Hound and Bee froze in mid packing of marshmellows, graham crackers, chocolate, soda, popcorn, and of course the movie. The collision came from outside and the house was extremley quiet until the loud noise. They listened, straining their audios to find if Cade will come barging in with his "foot up ass tasting toes till Christmas" or Tessa with her hands on her hips with the infamous "I'm going to torture your souls" glare.

Nothing stirred. Just a few creaky floorboards from the adjusting foundation, and of course:

"Primus..."

"Crosshairs you idiot! Didn't you know that would happen?"

"Shu'd up!"

Rolling his eyes, Hound threw in a few makeshift chairs created just for them before jumping off the kitchen counter, watching out for Toodles, the fur of evil! Ghosting the tile floors, he stepped outside to find Drift (back in robot mode,) hanging upside down by his ped and a cord hanging out his aft. It'd be nasty for humans but to Autobot's it doesn't matter.

The projector was luckily safe with Crosshairs as the cushion. All you could see was hands on one side, feet and coattails on the other. He wasn't moving; Bee trailed after Hound and immediately started playing a laugh track. The older bot rolled his optics as he pointed to Drift and put the finger back to his lips. Nodding, Bee scrambled up the tree and began helping the cool mech, trying not to point out his position, he didn't want another dent in his head.

Hound flipped the projector over; Crosshairs goggles were broken yet he popped his head up and gave the older mech a cheeky grin.

"I told ya I could defy deaf'."

"Don't be cocky." Hauled to his feet, Crosshairs was thrown in the direction of the barn while Hound grabbed the projector, using his shoulder to carry the device while Drift and Bee were mutually silent dropping from the tree.

Reaching the barn; everyone set up seats, created a mini bonfire, whipped out the ingredients for human smores, soda, and popcorn. They could eat and drink human energy supplies. They were much tastier than energon; it clogged their pipes though. A guilty pleasure which everyone will enjoy tonight. Crosshairs helped Hound set up the projector, grumbling about the movie choice.

"Why comedy? Why not some action?"

"Too loud, will wake the humans, don't want to get in trouble, and I think we all need a good laugh."

"Stupid skmrmrmr........" he trailed off helping plug in the movie. He wasn't looking forward to it.

Drift and Bee were roasting the marshmellows, Drift taking care to make sure he didn't burn the delicate pillows while Bee torched them screaming, " _I make fire! Man make fire!_ " So immature. Why oh why did Optimus want Bee to be second in command? The human must've hit the Prime's processor one too many times while repairing him. Drift gently grabbed the sticks and pulled them away before grabbing a pan already covered with tinfoil, putting the popcorn over the fire. Soon the kernels turned into popcorn with a vibrating Drift, vibrating away from the fire, his optics turning darker.

Finally, Crosshairs strode over and grabbed Drift, ultimately stopping him from going into the mini koi fish pond. It was built for Drift courtesy of KSI. Crosshairs opened the popcorn and grabbed a handful, scarfing it down. He smiled at the taste before moving himself over to the smores as the movie began to play.

It was about a man who lied a lot and his child wished his dad couldn't lie for a full day. It was an interesting movie to say the least. Hound enjoyed this more than the other three. Bee was too young really to like it; Crosshairs doesn't like anything where there isn't guns shooting, battles, or even a car chase; and Drift? It was weird.

"Why is the man beating himself up?" or "What's wrong with him? I'm sure he can lie if he chose to."

In the end it was a good night for them. The morning sucked though for Toodles was licking marshmellow off them all while Shane complained they could've invited him and Tess with a disapproving Cade telling the young man to back off.


	8. Chapter 8

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/Songs *Bangs head against a desk*_ **

* * *

An alarm rang at seven in the morning. It was annoying playing a song called Fancy.

**_I'm so fancy_ **

**_You already know_ **

**_I'm in the backseat_ **

**_from L.A. to Tokyo_ **

"Someone please shut tha' racket off!" Crosshairs grumbled, throwing his servo's over his audials as the song kept blaring. The Autobot's decided to sleep with Tessa out of protection and not to mention they lost so much body heat in the middle of the night. Right now he was curled up against Tessa's neck. Bee was quietly snoozing, his head bobbing in tune to the song. He purred happily while Drift awoke to the sun high in the sky, shining in his blue optics. Popping his back, the samurai sat up on top of Tessa before darting over to the sleeping teenager.

Waving his arms around like a maniac he tried to be loud yet not to the point of yelling.

"Tessa!! It's seven in your time! Don't you start class in twenty minutes?!"

Hazel eyes snapped open and immediately, Drift, Bee, and Cross were thrown across the room while Tessa streaked in her pink underwear with a grey tank top on, gathering clothes, her cellphone immediately talking to Shane, and her textbooks; dashing down the stairs and into the awaiting boyfriend-of-a-racer's car. It did a huge doughnut, kicking up dust as they flew down the gravel road off to the respective college.

Bee sat up looking around wildly as he was trying to piece together what had happened.

" _What just happened?_ "

"Tessa." came Crosshairs groan as he fell back on the hardwood floor, missing the warmth from the human. Yes he still resented the human race as a whole, he will admit he missed the warmth and craved for the return of her. Knowing college, she will be able to escape the hot Texas sun while they suffered.

Cade walked in with a cup of coffee in hand and Hound balancing on his shoulder with a tiny mug of his own. The two mature men of the house looked down at the three bots before Cade smiled.

"Let me guess: Tessa was late for class."

"That is correct." Drift softly replied, drowsiness lacing his vocalizer. Cade gave a nod before taking a violent swig of his drink leaving the three Autobot's alone.

Bee looked over to an open drawer, the one that Tessa yanked him away from a few weeks ago. He had been trying to get in there ever since the incident with no success but now this could be his chance! With a devious soundtrack playing, Bee tip toed over to the drawer and heaved it open, climbing the bulky rectangle. Swinging his body over, the scout's aft connected with a little box which had little squares and inside the squares were squishy circle's.

Bee picked one up and tossed it over the drawer, respectively hitting Crosshairs in the face.

"Ah'm gonna kill ya soon an' tha's a promise."

" _Yeah, yeah._ " Bee flippantly replied as he threw a box out and grabbed what felt like soft cushion's. He climbed out but as soon as his peds touched the floor, he was hit in the face with this huge white thing. And there standing two feet away was Crosshairs holding the old case in his hand before grabbing another; peel, aim, shoot, repeat. Peel Aim Shoot Repeat!!

An all out war begun between the two Autobot's with Drift on the side lines, taking tally on who has the highest score. Some hours later, Drift calculated Crosshairs won by default as Bee was literally buried under the white ammo with strings attached. Tessa walked in and threw a fit, throwing both Bee and Crosshairs in seperate jars, shoving them into her closet, grumbling about how tampons weren't used as weapons.

 


	9. Chapter 9

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/Songs *Rollerskates right into a pole*_ **

* * *

Today was a lazy day. Everyone was really worn out and tired. Tessa was flopped on her bed, Crosshairs laying in between her boobs, Bee curled by her neck, and Drift laying on her thighs in a blissful recharge. It was now officially week four of the shrinkage of Autobot's and so far, there was no solution appearing any time soon. Hound and Cade were still tinkering with the holoform with no success. It was so bad that Joyce was going to come and help them when his schedule permitted him to visit the farm.

Tessa was currently stroking Crosshairs back, as he curled on his side and was strangely quiet. Too quiet for anyone's taste.

"Crosshairs?" Tessa whispered, stopping her ministrations and noticing Crosshairs still trembling. She wondered what was wrong with him, before going back to stroking his back, hoping it subconsciously calmed the paratrooper.

**_"Crosshairs!" A grouchy voice called through the thicket of smoke. Crosshairs couldn't move. He was pinned under debris from a glass building, his wires sparking and whipping about, HUD telling the rookie he was going to go into emergency stasis soon. The paratrooper's head was spinning and the world was dangerously darkening. An explosion came dangerously close to the stranded soldier as he couldn't access his language centers to cry out for help. A figure moved in front of him, paranoia and fear hitting his instincts painfully. Crosshairs started struggling, trying to free himself and not die today. Large hands came from the smoke, triggering Crosshairs to release his built in daggers, slashing at them._ **

**_"Knock your slag off kid! It's me!" The large hands placed themselves on each side of his face and stared into those aqua optics, matching the teal paint job before relaxing. It was his squadron leader, Kup, the old veteran of the Golden Age. He was as big as a Decepticon but he was an Autobot._ **

**_'Thank Primus!'_ **

**_"Kid? Kid? Can you hear me?" All that Crosshairs could hear was static and weird feedback. His circuits were fried! Kup frowned and said something soothing before lifting the boulder off his crippled soldier._ **

**_'Crud! I can't understand him!'_** **_The teal mech hoisted Crosshairs into a sitting position before whipping off his red and blue goggles, putting them on his subordinate. Crosshairs raised an optic ridge before realizing he was understanding his leader._**

**_"I made these around your age, they adapt to any situation, and will never screw up your vision." Hoisting the rookie onto his back, Kup moved forward, his denta gritting with determination. Crosshairs admired this mech for his strength but not for his plans requiring patience. He was a mech of action, not of peace!_ **

**_"I swear you're worse than-" Within that instance, Kup's head went missing, Crosshairs tumbled off the headless body and fell into a nearby ditch, his world spinning chaotically with the screams of people, bombs, gunfire; he just wanted it all to stop!!_ **

"Crosshairs?" Tessa held the little mech in her hands, softly nudging him with her pinky. The eyes opened drowsily and looked up at the human before shaking his head.

'It was just a dream. A memory. And here I am the only one out of possibly six Autobot's living today.' He never forgot that damn midget called Brains. That little shit got into stuff he shouldn't get into! A hand touched his shoulder and Crosshairs turned to face Drift whom looked concerned.

::What is bothering you? You worried Tessa and I when you never responded to us.::

::Ah'm fine just a memory flux.::

::It worries us.::

::Again Ah'm fine just a memory.::

::Remember Crosshairs, you should not keep things to yourself. It might make you worse than you are now.::

::Drift all Ah want to do is recharge.:: He wasn't going to put up with the samurai. Nestling himself in the warm palms of Tessa's hands, Crosshairs curled up and went into recharge, hoping for a much better memory to drift along.


	10. Chapter 10

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/Songs *Sits in an empty locker and waits for a rescue*_ **

* * *

Bee just _had_ to be curious! Crosshairs was pissed as he silently smacked Bee around in the ever changing matter of the room. This was beyond stupidity! How did he come to watching this slagger again?

**_The sunlight was trickling through the window as Crosshairs shifted comfortably against the mounds. For humans, they were quite comfortable and he got the best place to sleep! Drift slept usually on one side of Tessa's neck while Bee chose the other side, each side being extremely warm. That wasn't for Crosshairs; yes he liked attention but he wanted his space and all the humans respected him and his privacy._ **

**_Well almost everyone._ **

**_Suddenly the door burst open and there was a flash of light before anyone could react. Everyone jumped out of bed ready to fight: Crosshairs with his triple Cybertronian barrel revolver, Drift with his samurai blades, and Bee with his laser cannon. Tessa prepared herself for battle holding up her ultimately twelve inch book and hurled it at the intruder._ **

**_"OUCH! GUYS!" The figure went down only for the head to pop up with those vibrant eyes Tessa fell in love with the first time._ **

**_"Shane?" Before anyone could react, Tessa grabbed her pillow and chucked it at him. Shane rolled out of the way, grabbing his Polaroid camera and waving the picture that the camera spat out. Bee ran over to Shane and snatched the pic out of his hand, running back to the safety of Tessa while Shane lunged himself at the mini Autobot only to come up short._ **

**_"Give that back!" A Cybertronian revolver was pointed at his nose. Crosshairs wasn't even looking at him, he was looking at Tessa who studied the picture. There she wasasleep like Disney's Sleeping Beauty with Bee and Drift laying all curled up against her neck like puppies, Crosshairs curled up like a kitten with his head laying on her purple bra._ **

**_Heat flooded the young teen's cheeks before getting up and walking to the back of her closet where Joyce had luckily installed a safe. Normally it was used for saving money and protecting objects from her childhood but this picture needed to forever stay hidden. She quietly started unlocking all the locks while Shane got on his feet with Crosshairs and Drift staring up at him in disapproval._ **

**_"What?"_ **

**_"What were ya thinkin'!" Crosshairs asked aiming his gun now at his crotch. Drift scurried onto the bed as he watched Cade pop into the doorway, Hound propped on his shoulder. Cade looked furious, leaning against his daughter's doorway. The racer was desperately trying to explain himself as best he could, holding the incriminating camera._ **

**_"I-I didn't mean to do that! Just well Tessa always whips out her camera and takes random pictures of me. Especially when I'm not expecting it to happen! She even took a picture of me in the shower!"_ **

**_Cade snapped._ **

**_"YOU DID WHAT?!" Everyone jumped at the man of the House minus Drift and Hound. Bee scurried into the backpack and Crosshairs equally ran in, not wanting to be squished or used as evidence. Bee buried himself under a crap load of notebooks while Crosshairs hid behind a textbook._ **

**_The yelling got louder with a few shrieks, some furniture thrown, ground shaking, and eventually the backpack was picked up, the two bots inside bouncing up and down wildly from side to side. A pencil whizzed by Crosshairs audios, as he sought refuge, crawling next to Bee, avoiding all the flying objects._ **

**_"Of course we get to be the ones in trouble again." The paratrooper snarled as Bee freaked out._ **

**_"_ ** _Find a happy place! Find a happy place! Find a happy place! **"**_

**_Crosshairs couldn't agree more._ **

They didn't know what was going on until there was the sound of people chattering, screams, shouts, and a lecture soon perked Crosshairs audio's. They were at Tessa's school.

"Now students, please grab your History textbook and turn to page two hundred thirty five." The flap came open and they stared up to see a shocked Tessa as she pulled out her textbook.

"Guys!" She whispered, shocked by their presence. They both looked to each other before Crosshairs whispered back, "Don' worry, we'll keep quiet."

" _Yeah don't worry be happy!_ "

"Quiet!" Crosshairs locked Bee in a headlock and put his servo over Bee's mouth. He shot Tessa a smile before letting her grab her textbook and return to her studies. As soon as the flap casted darkness on the two mech's, Crosshairs threw Bee to the other side of the bag before pouncing on him and kepping a finger to his lips.

::No more radio snippets!:: He snapped as Bee grabbed a spare notebook and shaped it into a mini lounger looking at his comrade.

:: _Fine, fine._ :: With that they both sat in silence listening to snippets of the lecture before Bee started annoying Crosshairs.

:: _If you could, would you bang Tessa?_ ::

::Wha' kind of a question is that'?::

:: _A what if? question._ :: Bee pressed, rising from his lounger and standing in front of Crosshairs. The green mech shook his head. Sure Tessa was hot and nice but Cade's thunderous temper and the fact that Tessa was human, it wasn't meant to be.

::Nah I wouldn't.::

:: _Ooooooh! I think you would!_ ::

::Seriously?:: Crosshairs jumped to his feet and snarled, throwing on his goggles. That was a point to stop taunting the easily-tempered paratrooper but Bee was having too much fun with this. The little camaro poked Crosshairs in the chest and sang, :: _Crosshairs and Tessa sitin' in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-!_ ::

The bot didn't have time to react as Crosshairs tackled the little bot and started throwing punches, his fury boiling over. Why didn't anybody leave him alone? All he wanted was some slaggin' peace! Bee threw his hand up and grabbed one of Crosshairs hands, twisting it in the opposite direction. Crosshairs bit his lip hard, tasting energon while Bee flipped him off and grabbed a pen, aiming it at the paratrooper like a sword. Crosshairs grabbed a huge pink eraser and held it up, shielding himself from the rookie's slashes, examining his wrist.

The wires were sparking and energon was threatening to leak from his cables but he continued on with his onslaught. With a grunt, Crosshairs pressed forward and overwhelmed Bee, the pen sinking through the eraser and coming in between his legs. Crosshairs threw the pink eraser aside as he chased Bee around.

They scurried over objects, crawled into pockets, and even slid into another mini bag before being yanked out and tossed into the back of the car. With a pained cry Crosshairs started cursing.

"Son of a glitch! What the frag were ya thinkin'?!" The flap opened and there Tessa was with Shane driving away from the college. Bee climbed out and jumped into Shane's lap, the Irish-American wasn't the least affected. Tessa grabbed Crosshairs out by his waist and dragged him intro her lap, seeing his wrist.

"Crosshairs?"

"It was Bumblebee. Little slagger twisted my wrist in the wrong direction." He mumbled, pride now deflated horribly. Bee's laughing wasn't helping and Tessa threw a glare at the camaro before staring down at the prone green form. She lightly traced a finger down Crosshairs back. Normally he'd shrug it off but with the stinging pride and how much his wrist hurt, he decided to sink back into the touch.

After all it had been a rough morning for everyone in that house.

 


	11. Chapter 11

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/Imagination*Throws on Sherlock's hat and grabs a magnifying glass*_ **

* * *

**_This was spooky! He had been invited to this creepy mansion and by who? Well by this guy named J. Bodie. Driving down this gravel street, rain pouring on his new sleek green Chevy Corvette, Crosshairs wasn't happy to say the least._ **

**_The wipers were going back and forth rapidly but it was still hard to see in this terrential down pour. Up the street, he saw lights through the distorted windshield and came closer and closer, spotting other colorful splotches. Deciding it would be better to hike in the rain than risk an accident, he pulled over and hastily exited with his green trench coat sticking against his now soaking legs._ **

**_"Stupid fraggin' spike suckin'-" Other curses were muttered as Crosshairs exited his vehicle, activating his nightvision, and continued now to the mansion soaked from head to ped in water._ **

**_"This better be worth it or I'll-" A honk and tires later a huge wave of water engulfed the former trooper now banker, Crosshairs yelled off obscenities while the driver of the yellow Chevy Camaro laughed loudly. They had been at each other's necks for a while and to see the banker covered from head to toe in mud made Bumblebee's day even brighter. He drove up to the house where he spotted all his friend's vehicles all drenched but still classy._ **

**_Killing the engine, Bumblebee happily jumped out of his car and marvelled at the house. Extremely old, mysterious, and-oh!_ **

**_"_ ** **Oh lah lah! _" Up above, Bumblebee saw the silhouette of a woman cast upon the third story window with a familiar samurai talking to her. Excited to see Tessa or by her stage name "Scarlet". Throwing open the door, Bee charged up the stairs, passing atrifacts of inventions Mr. Bodie collected and burst into the room. Drift unleashed his bright blue swords while wearing his peacock feathered helmet, Hound nearly choked on his purple cigar as Tessa was *glomped full force into the ground._**

**_"_ ** **Hi Tessa! _" Tessa returned the hug but scoffed at her equal in age._**

**_"Bee please, it's Scarlet." The youngest Autobot got up and brought Tessa up with him marvelling her red dress and sapphires around her neck. The servant Shane marvelled at her bodice while serving Hound another cocktail. J. Bodie strolled right in, both his glasses and shiny bald head had the reflections of the flames from the fireplace shimmering on the surfaces._ **

**_He smiled and looked around but slowly frowned when he counted up the number of his guests._ **

**_"Where's Crosshairs?"_ **

**_Bumblebee snickered before getting smacked on the back of the head by Drift as he generously accepted another cocktail from the youthful servant. Hound rolled his optics as he blew another billow of purple smoke._ **

**_"What are we doin' here again?"_ **

**_"I am sorry to inform you but I cannot disclose any information until all the guests have arrived." Josh walked to the fireplace, marvelling at the architecture of the fireplace. Ever since he was a kid, he was marvelled by his family's wealth which made him drive to become new money and not his family's old money._ **

**_'Too bad I won't get to see this anymore.'_ **

**_The door flung open and in waltzed Crosshairs, soaked from head to toe and giving Bee the death glare as he shuffled over to the fireplace. He did not care if he was going to ruin his paint job but he was freezing his aft off! Mr. Josh Bodie watched the disgruntled paratrooper warm himself by the fire, not caring about the people in the room (well minus Bumblebee who was hiding behind Tessa, a sneaky smirk on his face plates.) Tessa checked out Shane in his white tuxedo as he moved over to Crosshairs offering a drink but was turned down as Crosshairs glared at Josh._ **

**_"Why the hell am Ah here?"_ **

**_With a sigh, Josh replied, "Since all my guests are here, I have brought you all here tonight for a special event." Everyone looked at one another before the host started speaking again, circling the room with a cigar billowing black smoke._ **

**_"You all have nasty secrets, ones that I have been blackmailing you about. Such as Drift," he pointed to the stone faced Autobot, "he was originally a Decepticon named Deadlock who slaughtered innocent children. The lovely Tessa "Scarlet" you have been sleeping with directors to get roles in movies. Bee, a commander of the Autobot's who would sneak out with Stinger and trade paint marks."_ **

**_Everyone snickered at the blushing yellow bot but Josh wasn't done yet._ **

**_"Shane, you sabotaged race cars so then your chances of winning were in your favor. Hound, you illegally made weapons against Prime's wishes and last but not least, Crosshairs."_ **

**_Everyone turned their heads to Crosshairs but he didn't look shocked or mortified like the people in the room, in fact, he was casually lounging on the sofa drinking high grade energon. He watched Josh in anticipation._ **

**_"You entered illegal air space, massacred thousands of Decepticons, vandalized property, had sex with an outlaw, and executed with no warrant."_ **

**_"Guilty as charged." Crosshairs smirked, taking another swig of the energon. Mr. Bodie rolled his eyes before stating, "I was planning to expose you all for your blackmails but I wanted to play a game."_ **

**_"_ ** **Oooooh! _" Bee giggled and that's when the lights cut out!_**

"Tessa!"

"Yeah dad?"

"Is Lucky Charms upstairs with you?" Bee, Hound, Drift, and Crosshairs were standing where Peacock, Green, Plum, and Mustard should be while Shane had Mrs. White and Tessa Ms. Scarlet. Shane had snuck into her room before everybody hiked up into the attic while the weather outside raged on, making it a perfect setting for the game Bee managed to dig out. It seemed to appeal to the Autobot's sense of mystery fun.

"Noooo!" Tessa yelled back to her dad as she dug into another piece of pizza from the pizza box. The candles gave the game an eerie feel to the game that is if they are left in peace to finish the game. It didn't help that Crosshairs wanted an image of Mr. Bodie thus creating a voodoo doll representation of Joshua Joyce (much to Crosshairs' delight.) They were in the attic, the creepiest part of the house besides the basement, flickering candles, rain with a crap load of lightning and thunder, throw in the creaking house, and ba-BAM! Creepiness and a mystery game. Now if only to move along...

"Tessa! Come down and do your chores!"

With that, Tessa left hearing her friend's yelling at her to hurry up so they can start the game and hearing them all start "gossiping" as they took advantage of an absent woman.

 


	12. Chapter 12

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/Imagination *Pulls out a flashlight and shines it at a creepy painting*_ **

* * *

**_There was a shriek coming from below the group. Tessa clung onto someone warm and human, totally freaked out by what was going on and there was a grunt followed by a clang!_ **

**_"_ ** **OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!! _"_**

**_"Ah it is the one who mastered the puppy dog eyes to get what he desires. That is below you." Drift chuckled as he walked back over to the fireplace and drew out his other blade, striking the metal together and making sparks fly back onto the wood. The room lit up again. Crosshairs was out like a light, helm dented by a blunt object; Tessa clutching onto Shane like her life depended on it, Bee holding his helm, and then Hound was casually lounging in the corner smoking his cigar._ **

**_When Shane and Tessa's eyes locked with each other, they immediately parted with a heavy blush. Shane stared up at the ceiling while Tessa looked over to where Crosshairs was and noticed something was off. She looked around before asking, "Where's Mr. Bodie?"_ **

**_Everyone glanced around the room before noticing that the door was ajar, eerily creaking open as if beckoning the group to come find out why it's open. Bee immediately put his arms in an x shape and started complaining, "_ ** **Nuh-uh! No way am I going back out there! _"_**

**_"I must agree with Bumblebee, we do not know what is out there." Drift replied as he lightly shook Crosshairs in an attempt to wake him. Heavy footsteps came up the stairs, making everyone go silent in anticipation as they made their way down the hall and towards their door. Bee freaked and slammed the door shut, locking it before grabbing a chair, positioning it under the doorknob in case the lock was broken._ **

**_The door rattled as the unknown perpetrator banged and rammed the door; Tessa was scared witless enough to faint into Shane's arms while Bee brandished his weapon. The door stopped shaking and soon the footsteps retreated downstairs in a calm manner. Drift watched the door for a few more seconds before turning back to Crosshairs and shook him._ **

**_"Crosshairs?" A glint of silver caught the samurai's optic from under the couch Crosshairs occupied. Reaching a hand under the couch, Drift wasn't aware Hound approached the unconscious mech and grabbed his smoking cigar from in between his lip plates and using his free hand, plucked up Crosshairs servo and slammed the lit end into Crosshairs palm!_ **

**_"AGH!!!!" Crosshairs hissed. He remembered the room going dark before there was a splitting pain in his processor, and then the burn._ **

**_"What happened?" He asked, not knowing for sure what had happened. From the supplying evidence, Mr. Bodie disappeared, and Tessa was just regaining consciousness. Drift came from under the couch producing a silver candlestick that had a few dents and a stripe of green paint._ **

**_'My green paint.' Crosshairs thought as he hoisted himself off the couch and walked over to Tessa, worried about her safety._ **

**_"You okay?"_ **

**_"I'll be fine, thanks." Tessa replied to Crosshairs as Shane helped her back to her feet. She wasn't enjoying this little "special event." All the scarlet wanted to do was go home, take a nice warm bath, and wonder what her next movie will be. Instead, she's stuck with five men in a creepy mansion and worst of all, there's a potential attacker in the house! With a sigh, Tessa muttered, "Apparently the letter said we call each other by the alias's provided in the...candlestick?" Drift looked at the candlestick clutched in his servo and locked gazes with Crosshairs before flickering their optics over to Bee who was still monitoring the door._ **

**_Crosshairs winked to Drift and in five seconds flat Bee was on the ground and in Drift's hand was a note. Clearing his throat, Drift read, "Dear guests, as you have seen the game has commenced. After you receive your alias, please proceed downstairs to participate in the game. Happy hunting!"_ **

**_Shane grabbed the note, chuckled, and replied, "These aliases is something we are wearing or something that reminded Mr. Bodie of. Anyways, the names go like this; Tessa, you are Ms. Scarlet; Crosshairs you are Mr. Green; Drift, you are Mr. Peacock; Bee is Colonel Mustard; Hound is Professor Plum; and I am Mr. White."_ **

**_"_ ** **I'm not going downstairs! Who knows who's out there? _" The room was silent and finally Crosshairs whipped out his precious Cybertronian revolver, pulled the hammer bacl and growled, "I'm going to get this done!" He stomped over to the door, picked up the chair and threw it against the wall. The chair shattered like glass before wrenching the door open and ran down the stairs._**

**_Everybody else followed Crosshairs lead, rushing down the stairs into the now working lighted house. Walking from the stairs to the main room, and Tessa shrieked and wailed._ **

**_For in a pool of blood was Mr. Bodie._ **

" _This is taking too long!_ " Bee complained as he was now standing by the Lounge and Dining Room, Crosshairs by the Conservatory, Drift by the Billiard Room, Hound by the Kitchen, Tessa by the Ballroom, and Shane was by the Study. The teenage girl had her hand in her hair. She did suggest they not play the game since it was a slow strategy game but they insisted. Drift didn't seem to mind and Crosshairs was sitting on his tile, waiting to roll the dice again. Hound seemed to be enjoying this game as he smoked again before looking to Bee.

"Kid ya asked to play the game. We are going to finish what we started."

"Alright," Shane grabbed the dice and rolled again.

**_Crosshairs walked over to Mr. Bodie and put two digits against the pulse area of the neck. No pulse._ **

**_"Definitely, dead." Crosshairs grunted as he turned the body over, looking for any incriminating evidence. No bruises, no stab wounds, no gunshot wounds, no nothing!_ **

**_"So much for a weapon..." The paratrooper muttered as the rest of the group examined the paratrooper, his green trench coat now soaked with blood. They were looking around for clues about the murder, just they didn't broaden their search until a set of footsteps came to the group and there was the maid with a silver platter. Now she looked sexy in a skimpy outfit, the first thing that came out of Hound's mouth, "Put on some darn clothes!"_ **

**_The maid tipped her head off to the side and gave Drift the platter. She took the cover off and underneath was another letter. Bee grabbed the next letter and read aloud, "_ ** **One of you has killed me. Your objective: find out who murdered me, with what, and where. Winner doesn't get arrested. I called the cops and they'll arrive in approximately an hour. Happy hunting. P.S. If anyone else is murdered tonight you have got to solve their murders like you're going to solve mine. You will also be spared the trip to jail. _"_**

**_"Well this is great." Crosshairs muttered, face palming himself. Drift gave the platter back to the maid with the letter and addressed his comrades._ **

**_"We should split up into groups of two. I will go with Cross-I mean Green, Plum you're with Mustard, Scarlet you're with White."_ **

**_Wordlessly, everyone split up into the groups they were assigned to._ **

**_Bee and Hound decided to take the basement after seeing Tessa bristle at the suggestion of her doing it. They crept down the stairs that squeaked and creaked flashing their lights around jars of mummified animals. Bee nearly purged at the thought. Hound was somewhat fascinated at it, the grotesque was weird and gross but he liked seeing things that were hideous that didn't touch him._ **

**_A piercing shriek cut through the silence and Hound whipped out his mini-gun, spinning around to find Bee swatting at a cobweb stuck to his faceplates, the girl screaming track playing._ **

**_"_ ** **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _" Hound rolled his optic's and went to the flailing youth, Bee immediately hitting a part of the wall. It gave way, Bee crashing into the newly discovered passage way._**

**_::Hound-I mean Plum! What happened?:: Drift asked, concerned for his former comrade's safety. Hound shook his head and got the cobwebs out of Bee's optic's before replying, ::Kid Mustard here got spooked. Nothin' too major.::_ **

**_::Alright I better tell the other's it's a false alarm. Peacock out.:: The engineer rolled his optics. Why the alias's again? It still escaped him but now wasn't the time to get all worked up. This kid just found an important clue that could help finish this game! Helping Bee to his feet, Hound supported him as they shared the secret passageway together._ **

**_"Let's hope this is the ticket out of this crazy game."_ **

**_"_ ** **PLEASE LET THIS BE OVER WITH!! _" Bumblebee hollered, his echo's bouncing off the halls walls. With a clank to the head, the two continued in silence, not bothering to see the shadowy figure behind them._**

 


	13. Chapter 13

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/Imagination *Pulls out a flashlight and shines it at a creepy painting*_ **

* * *

The guys had to stop playing when footsteps were bounding up the stairs excitedly. Shaun leaped behind a few boxes and other pieces of junk as the door was kicked open with Cade happily whooping and cheering with Joshua Joyce who calmly walked in. The Autobot's bristled at the other man's presence; they didn't forget what he had done to their kind. Now the Autobot's would scatter for a fighting formation yet they didn't want to lose their spot on the game. Bee raised an optic ridge and blared out, " _The hell are you rootin' and tootenin' about?_ "

That's where Cade produced a small blue box now labelled as The Holoform 2.0. He smiled like the Joker as he started explaining, "With the help of Hound and Josh, we finally fixed it!" Bee jumped up and down playing his trademark, " _I'm so excited!_ " Crosshairs said, "Finally!" Drift and Hound looked to one another, raising an optic ridge.

Cade pointed the invention at the bots and pressed a red button.

" _Here we go!_ " All the Autobot's closed their eyes and clenched their fists in anticipation. Hound opened his optics first and rolled his optics.

::Guys, it didn't work.:: The other's opened their optic's and they were disappointed. Crosshairs threw a tantrum, steam coming out of his audios as he threw his arms around in the air in anger. Bumblebee mimicked crying, his doorwings pressed against his body, sinking down onto the board game. Drift sighed with sadness yet he was calm while Hound crossed his arms in frustration. Joyce rolled his eyes and told Cade, "Remember, we didn't get the correct materials and your scraps from other machines aren't compatible. I have a shipment of some of the left over Transformium to use for the holoform."

Nobody liked that idea but right now, they'd do _anything_ to have their disguises and be back to their normal sizes. Tessa frowned and Joyce backed off with Cade in tow. Shane came out after hearing the screen door close.

He walked over and saw the frustrated bots plus a crying Bee. Tessa pulled out Mustard and scooped up Bee while placing the figure in his place. Stroking a finger up and down in between Bee's doorwings, Tessa watched as Crosshairs marched over to his spot before he went on a hissy fit and grumbled, "Les finish this and be done!"

**_Drift rolled his optics as Crosshairs started posing in the mirror. They were currently investigating the attic, surrounded by dusty artifacts that Bodie had accumulated over the years. One of them happened to be a mirror where things to try on seemed to appear. Crosshairs had his same armor on just a different color; his was in the scheme of red and blue flames._ **

**_"Ah'd look good as Prime!" That earned him a smack on the back of his helm. Drift rolled his optics and looked around, holding out his swords as they were his appendages to lift up the sheets from old furniture. Crosshairs smirked and a devious thought popped into his head. He got onto his hands and knees, quietly creeping under a piece of furniture and waited._ **

**_"Do you think Mr. Bodie's killer could've been here?" Drift called back to Crosshairs. There was no response from the mech who constantly complained about the humans. He looked back and no Crosshairs._ **

**_"Crosshairs?"_ **

**_A hand snapped out of nowhere and grabbed Drift's ankle. The stoic mech freaked out and slashed a sword at the protruding hand and earned a yowl._ **

**_"DAMNIT DRIFT!!!!!!" Withdrawing his hand, Crosshairs examined it and groaned. He was bleeding and then there was a scream._ **

**_Everybody crowded around the body of the maid, the maid who wore a skimpy maid's outfit. Shane groaned in dismay, Tessa smacked him upside the head, and the four bots looked to one another shrugging._ **

**_This time the killer left a couple clues: there was an electrical burn on her leg and it travelled up and out her ear. The necklace she was previously wearing is gone, also there was blue tufts of hair on her shoes. That last clue earned a couple of eyebrow raises._ **

**_"Do you guys know anyone like this?" Tessa asked. All the Autobot's looked at one another before Bee caught the sight of a little midget who was hiding behind the extremely expensive china vase. He nudged Hound who nudged Drift who nudged Crosshairs. They all looked at the vase and with a final glance at one another they all started conversing onto the vase. The little shadow (who saw the two in the basement,) was currently mulling over the piece of jewelry he managed to grab off the lady's neck._ **

**_It was soooooo beautiful! A sapphire in the middle of a stamped necklace that read, "Prostitute #001" Suddenly, "ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR!!!!" The vase was tackled, it broke, dirt flying everywhere, the plant landing on Bee's helm, and the blue figure was screaming all the way._ **

**_Shane and Tessa watched in fright yet in amusement as the Autobot's looked all funky. Drift and Hound were covered in dirt, spitting it out their intakes, and Bee looked like he has dreadlocks, and then there was Crosshairs who had the culprit in his bulky fingers: Brains._ **

**_"Hey! Hey! Hey! Put me down! Put me down! I did nothin' wrong!" Brains yelled but his story didn't work as everyone saw him fritz, his blue hair shed, and the necklace was in his clutches._ **

**_"Ya' a piece of wasted mahterials." Crosshairs muttered as he grabbed a seperate vase and dumped all the contents out, putting the culprit in the vase. It was like a lobster trap once the lobster goes in, it cannot get out. Brains was yelling little obscenities and the necklace was held in Drift's hands. Hound looked over to Brains and said, "You're goin' to jail."_ **

**_"Wait! I can tell you who murdered Mr. Bodie, just don't tell the cops I did this!" Everyone looked to one another before going into a huddle. Shane started, "We could let this slide. She was a prostitute, a lot of people don't care about them."_ **

**_"Why do you say a lot of people don't care?" Drift asked. That was a weird question. Shane then replied, "Because some people will get offended if we say nobody cares."_ **

**_"_ ** **Who? _" Bee asked. Everyone looks up at the ceiling and dramatically broadcasted through the radio, "_ We shall never know. The universe is full of mysteries _." Brains sweatdropped at the scene before everyone got back together. While everyone whispered to one another, (and an occasional slap to Bee's helm) made Brains reconsider the deal and actually killing the prostitute for a necklace that wouldn't even help him with his leg. Finally after a brief discussion, everyone breaked and Tessa said, "You promise you will tell?"_**

**_"Of course! The murderer is-"_ **

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE!?" Everyone looked to see Cade with an axe and staring at Shaun with a murderous glare. That's when he came charging in, the game being strewn, Autobot's being flung and scrambling for cover, Shaun running around the attic before fleeing out of the house, and Tessa yelling at her dad to leave her boyfriend alone.

Right then and there, everyone concluded: Mr Bodie was murdered with an axe, in the attic, and it was at the hands of Cade Yeager.

 


	14. Chapter 14

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/Imagination *Creeps into a cemetary and scares Slenderman away*_ **

* * *

It was _finally_ Halloween! It was completely dark on the farm, looking extremely abandon and creepy with no one in the barn. Actually nobody was home at the Yeager farm. Everyone went to Chicago to work on the holoform. Cade was currently gone with Josh and his scientists while Shane, Tessa, and the little bots were currently in Josh's penthouse, celebrating Halloween.

Currently said four Autobot's were currently in costume some not liking their costumes like the others.

"Why do I got to be the pumpkin!?" Hound cursed out, rolling helplessly on his back like a turtle on their back. Crosshairs was currently putting fangs in his mouth, his coattails painted black on the outside and the underside a bright red. Actually, Crosshairs was black from head to toe (minus his face.) Bee was currently admiring his mummy costume, toilet paper wound around his form, and Drift well he was a samurai but he was a ghost, all painted white and covered in flour. Dift wasn't too pleased with his new look but it was for a special occassion so he'll let it slide.

Bumblebee hummed happily with his doorwings fluttering happily as he danced teasingly around the struggling Hound.

" _Because you are the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown!_ "

"Bee once I get up, I'm gonna slag you!"

" _Not anytime and plus I'll become a ghost! Much scarier than a pumpkin!_ "

"That has already been taken Bumblebee!" Drift snapped. Bee blew raspberries through his radio before retreating to the teenagers at the other side of the table making jack-o-lanterns. Tessa was having problems making them since the knife kept getting stuck. Shane was currently scooping out pumpkin guts. It was gross and disgusting but that was the coolest part of carving pumpkins!

Bee jumped over to Tessa and pulled on her apron (which not surprisingly has no pumpkin guts.)

"Did you want something Bee?" Tessa asked, giving up on the knife and turning her attention to the now adorable mummy.

" _Can I climb on your shoulder?_ " Not even an answer as Tessa picked Bee up and deposited him on her shoulder. He cooed like a sparkling, earning a squeal from Tessa. Shane buried his hands deep within the pumpkin and yanked hard at the piece of gut that refused to budge. With two hard yanks from his slippery hands, the guts were released but unfortunately, they coated Crosshairs.

"HEY!!!"

"Sorry Crosshairs. Trying to get this damn thing carved!" Shane apologized, glancing over at the TV, watching Hocus Pocus. It had just started and Drift along with Hound were watching the movie from the table. Bee was too quiet for everyone's comfort; there must be a prank up his sleeves.

Crosshairs grumbled at now the loss of his costume. He was going to lose the paint job when he washed the pumpkin guts off. Going to the sink, Crosshairs turned on the hot water and took a shower, the black paint dripping off his form. He grumbled at the lose of his awesome costume; at least he had Plan B. Drying off, Crosshairs grabbed his tricorn hat and sewing needle, becoming his old Jack Sparrow self. With a smirk, Crosshairs bounded over to Hound and pushed him back onto his peds.

That's when the TV blared about a haunted house taking place at a park nearby the cemetary on the outskirts of the city.

" _Can we go? Please pretty please?_ "

"I don't know Bee," Tessa started as she finally made a successful cyclops jack-o-lanern, "dad told us not to leave the penthouse." Bee gave her the puppy dog eyes and she threw up her hands in defeat. Bee clapped his hands in excitement before rubbing them together deviously. He hopped off Tessa's shoulder and told her, " _Just before we go..._ " Bee grabbed the discarded pumpkin guts and threw them at Tessa.

Last thing anybody knew was Tessa's screams and then shoved into a bag.

This wasn't at all scary. The haunted house turned out to be a charity that needed the donations for an organization. What it was, nobody really paid attention to. Tessa wasn't even scared and she was the weak link when it came to haunted houses. A clown jumped out...nothing, a skeleton came out...not a peep, a witch grabbed her...yawn...

This was going nowhere fast. The mini autobot's looked to one another and they commed each other, ducking back into the bag when a group of trick or treaters ran past Shane, Tessa, and a cheap Frankenstein makeup.

::Ah never thought ta say this but this holiday sucks.:: Crosshairs said, crossing his arms in a huff. Drift and Hound silently nodded.

::Ya can't help but wonder what the point of this human holiday is.:: Hound replied as he tried to cross his arms but the pumpkin costume wouldn't let him. Bee fluttered his doorwings in an inspiring moment.

:: _Guys, guys! I know what we can do!_ ::

::Bumblebee, we cannot blow up KSI.:: Drift snapped, feeling his Decepticon side growing. Bee walked over to Drift and the others, his doorwings slanting in an offensive way.

:: _That's not what I was thinking. I want to go to a cemetary! Wouldn't that be cool? I mean sure there are dead humans in the ground or in the mausoleum but think about it: we could scare those two by hiding and jumping out at them!_ ::

There was silence for a few minutes before Crosshairs nodded.

::Sounds like a good plan. Ah'll get their attention.:: Poking his head out, "Jack Sparrow" looked up at Tessa and shouted, "Oi! Can we get outta here? This is not even worth it." Shane sighed and shrugged as a zombie dressed in bloody gauze ran out. Tessa turned to Shane and said, "I'm leaving." That was the statement that sealed the deal. Retreating into the woods, there was a trail that went directly to the cemetary. Bee whirred excitedly, nobody seemed to be in the cemetary. It was dark and creepy with the bonus of a fog settling to the ground, this was a perfect place to scare the teenagers witless!

Tessa lifted everybody out of her bag and set them on the nearest tombstone. Shane grabbed Tessa's hand and looked to the mini bots. He wanted to do something to Tessa she'll never forget but he couldn't do it with the other's watching. Coming up with a good excuse for them to leave him and Tessa alone, Shane turned to find the bots missing. Tessa had to do a double take before she panicked; if her father found out the Autobot's are missing and with them at this size...

"Guys? GUYS?!" Tessa yelled and Shane joined in to find their friends.

Meanwhile, Bee and Crosshairs were happily darting from tombstone to tombstone while Drift and Hound hung back. They knew it was an insult to dance on one's grave but the other two were happily dancing around on the graves, trying to catch another on ein a game of tag. Hound asked Drift, "Do you think it's really necessary to let our guard down around here?"

"No but to be honest maybe it is time to "let loose" as the humans say." Drift than ran and tickled Bee (who shrieked with fright before laughing.) Crosshairs joined them in a tickle fight, getting harder to determine who is tickling who. Hound chuckled as he lit his new cigar. This was turning out to be a new life that he couldn't imagine having. Finally after the dust had settled, Drift was standing triumphantly on top of Crosshairs and Bee who were still giggling like sparklings. The ghost was now stained with dirt and grass.

Bee whimpered "not fair" while Crosshairs adjusted his hat and threw Drift off him, whipping out his "sword" and running towards the large white marble structure. The mausoleum was decked out in cobwebs and the seal seemed to have never been disturbed in years. On the side of the wall read: Dedicated to Those Who Perished in Chicago.

Normally it would be a bad idea to sneak into such a place but the bots found a hole just their size to squeeze in. With their optics lit to unnaturally bright levels, they all scampered inside. To humans it was a normal sized entryway but to the little bots, this was enormous!

" _OOOOH! I hope we get to see an actual ghost!_ " Bumblebee squealed as he darted the furthest into the entryway while Drift marvelled at the architecture.

"This is impressive." He muttered and Crosshairs along with Hound rolled their optics. Obviously Drift caught the rolling optics and grabbed their heads before clanking them together. Both of the mechs rubbed their helms and glared at the samurai. Drift let his optic's carress the scene in front of him until something moved from the corner of his optics.

"Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh........................" came a soft whisper. Bee jumped at the noise while the other three looked around for the source of the noise. They couldn't track it as their optics roamed the mausoleum. There was no sign of the noise. Crosshairs huffed and suddenly came face to face with a large human all covered in blood and was transparent. The girl gave a sly smile before her mouth dropped open to show rows of teeth like what you would see in a shark before screaming.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" They all hightailed out of the mausoleum and towards Shane and Tessa. What they didn't see was Josh chuckling behind a projection screen while Cade's laugh echoed throughout the supposed sealed mausoleum. They came out of their hiding places, each giving each other a high five.

"Thanks for teachin' those mongrels a lesson!" Cade laughed. Josh had setup a baby monitor that was disguised as a sculpture (boy was that tricky it was practically ripped in two!) and set it up so then they could hear what those six kids were up to.

 


	15. Chapter 15

"Normal talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

**_Flashback/Imagination_ **

_Songs*Stands in the police light showing them my jazz hands*_

* * *

Bee chirped unhappily as his fans whirred with congestion. With the whole Jello fiasco, Bee was now sick. Tessa was wondering, how the hell do Cybertronian's get sick? At least Hound explained before Cade whisked him off to work on the holoform. When Cybertronians get sick it's because their tubings, wires, and fans are jammed with frost or gunk (in this case Jello) it mimics the humans’ common cold. The body reacts to getting rid of the gunk; unfortunately a virus is produced and now the frame has two problems: the gunk and the virus produced from over production of coding to combat the gunk.

For now he was cuddling against Tessa, with Crosshairs and Drift lounging on the bean bags beside Tessa. It was a lazy day. Sure they should be prepping for an invasion but it was pointless if they were the size of hotel shampoo bottles! Bee coughed and Tessa let her hand stroke in between his doorwings earning an appreciative mewl. Crosshairs rolled his optics.

"Bee it's not that serious!" the paratrooper sneered as Bee let out a tiny sneeze. Tessa rolled her eyes as Drift jumped in.

"Stop being a child! Your puppy dog eyes act was bad enough now this is taking it too far."

"Knock it off you two," Tessa groaned as she sank deeper into her bean bag, Bee safely tucked in the crook of her neck. "I don't want fighting right now. Dad isn't breathing down my neck, he's working, Shane isn't going to provoke a fight again, and for once, I don't have to do anything for school right now." Crosshairs and Drift both rolled their eyes but didn't complain.

They all directed their attention to the TV screen, watching a very quirky movie.

"You humans have quite the imagination." Drift piped up, watching a man wearing a green mask in an orange suit, dancing rapidly, once in a while throwing in a cartoon action or stunt. Soon, Bumblebee dozed off, nasally watching his dream unfold.

Tessa felt Bee relax in her arms and Crosshairs shifted over, now fully pressed against her neck. The girl raised an eyebrow.

"Did you need something Crosshairs?"

"Nah, Ah hate bein' cold."

"You're feeling cold?"

"Ya, somethin' wrong with tha'?"

"No. I thought it was weird because don't you guys have something inside you to regulate your temperatures?"

"Yes and no." Drift spoke, deciding to face Tessa, climbing in front of her. He sat on top of her chest and explained, "It usually depends on the frame types. Like mine." Drift gestured to himself, "I am extremely sensitive to temperature because of my triple changer frame. Crosshairs suffers from coldness because of old wounds acting up. The child here is only suffering from temperature fluxes due to his ailment."

"Oh ok." Tessa nodded with understanding as she relaxed back into her bean bag chair.

"Ow!" Drift and Crosshairs were startled by Tessa's cry and saw Bee's doorwings entangled with her long hair. Drift jumped to Tessa’s rescue and started untangling the hair with deft precision. Crosshairs would’ve helped but he knew he’d make it worse. The samurai got the hair out of the doorwings and resumed unwinding, watching the movie unfold. All was quiet and peaceful until a couple shots rang out, then Bee was startled out of his sleep. He rubbed his optics tiredly before stretching and pushed the remote button.

“Hey!” Crosshairs shouted, throwing his fist in the air with anger. Tessa raised an eyebrow at Bee.

“ _I want to show you guys something!_ ” Bee squealed as he poked Drift with his pede. An eye opened lazily, watching the yellow scout position himself so then the projection would be displayed on the wall.

So far everything looked like the movie they were previously watching. Although they were all watching in tension when suddenly the guy who was supposed to be wearing the green mask was replaced by Crosshairs. He was boarding up the gate to the park, losing the unknown cops. The real Crosshairs growled at the youngling and whipped out his pistol only to falter when his face jumped out with big eyes at the helicopter and SWAT team waiting for him. The dream Crosshairs stood there, glancing from the helicopter to the crowd of SWAT men. One of them happened to be Drift in that crowd. With a cheeky grin, Crosshairs jumped and yelled, “Hit it!”

Immediately the cops lights and the helicopter spotlight shined onto Crosshairs, revealing Crosshairs had traded his trenchcoat in for a top used for flamenco dancing with the puffy sleeves. He swayed his hips back and forth as flamenco music turned on, the Autobot dancing to the beat. The dream Drift started to as well yet stopped when he got glares from the cops. The real Crosshairs facepalmed and before he could demand the video be turned off, the dream Crosshairs began to sing, whipping out boxes of ammo.

 _They call me Cuban Pete. I'm the king of the rhumba beat. When I play the ammo boxes I go chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky boom_ Everybody was laughing hysterically as they watched the dream image of Crosshairs shaking his hips and chest, shimmying his way over to the cops. Heat swelled in his cheekplates and he snarled angrily as the song continued

_Yes sir, I'm Cuban Pete_

_I'm the craze of my native street. When I start to dance, everything goes chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky boom The senoritas they sing and how they swing with this rumbero,_

Everyone including Crosshairs went into fits of hysterical laughter as the women on the streets were actually Tessa and Joshua. Joshua was dressed in fishnet stockings, wearing a short leather shorts along with a latex top that revealed his bellybutton piercing. He wore bright red lipstick and a pink feather boa. Bee giggled as he slightly bounced to the tune, reminding himself to show Joshua the image of him being a prostitute. _It's very nice, so full of spice. And when they're dancing they bring a happy ring the maraquero, Singin' a song, all the day long. So if you like the beat, take a lesson from Cuban Pete And I'll teach you to chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky-boom._ The dream Crosshairs jumped over to dream Drift and waved his hands, getting Drift to start dancing and singing. Tessa and Bee continued laughing while the other two abruptly stopped, both faces blushing with embarrassment and awkwardness. _He's really a modest guy, although he's the hottest guy In Havana, in Havana._ The two mechs started doing a duet dance with their hips and the real pair were burying their faceplates in their servo’s too ashamed to continue watching the film. _Si, senorita I know that you would like to chicky-boom-chick It's very nice, so full of spice. I'll place my hand on your hip, and if you will just give me your hand Then we shall try - just you and I. Aye-aye-aye!_ The officers who were supposed to catch Crosshairs finally showed up. Surprisingly it’s Optimus Prime and Cade who watched the scene below. Instead of them being snarky towards each other like the original film suggested, they were both stunned and shocked. Cade yelled at his daughter to stop dancing while Crosshairs danced on top of a police cruiser. _So if you like the beat, take a lesson from Cuban Pete And I'll teach you chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky-boom_ He got off the car and managed to get every single person to do a congo line as they weaved their way through the gaps of police cruisers before dancing the night away. It would’ve worked until Optimus and Cade shot into the air, trying to free their officers of the hypnotic spell Crosshairs put them in. Catching the hint, Crosshairs slid out of the picture. _Shake Your Booty, Daddy, Wow! See ya!_

The film ended with Crosshairs dashing into the alleyway with all officers chasing him.

Tessa and Bumblebee giggled and occasionally burst out laughing from the memory of the dream. Crosshairs and Drift couldn’t bear to look at one another for the rest of the week. The end result: a very confused Cade and Hound.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE You guys ready for another little drabble? I do apologize if it has taken a long time to come back and do another one. Things happened and writing eluded me. My creativity has really started to bud out so expect maybe some more writings and maybe artwork. Enjoy you guys, and welcome back! Signing Off: The Sunflower Seed

"Normal Talk"

" _Bumblebee's Radio Talk_ "

::Comm. Link::

'Thoughts'

_**Flashback/Imagination *Shrugs with an awkward expression on my face*** _

* * *

Oh this was going to be good! Brains was sitting on top of a shelf, his camcorder up and filming the scene below in the living room. All the tiny Autobots formed a circle creating one half while Tessa, Shane, and Josh created the other half. Joshua was still flustered from the video Bumblebee showed him. In the middle of the circle was a glass bottle, waiting to be spun.

"Why are we playin' this again?" Crosshairs asked, sitting with Bumblebee to his right and Drift to his left. Hound was absent as he tried to help Cade at least a good idea on how to correct the little device. Bumblebee nudged Cross, " _Because we're doing Truth or Dare in a Russian Roulette fashion that you wanted._ "

"Truth or Dare? More like Interrogation or Humiliation!" Cross snarled back. Tess rolled her eyes and grabbed the bottle.

"Remember: when you spin the bottle and it lands on a person, you ask them truth or dare. If it lands back on you, you spin again. You have to tell the truth if prompted and perform the dare if told."

"We understand." Drift said softly. Sure he could've gone and meditated instead of doing a foolish activity such as this but he wanted to at least experience this game since it is a popular game among human teenagers.

Shane started laughing, "I still think it'd be funny if we actually play the real version of spin the bottle."

"Sorry I do not wish to exchange paint jobs." Drift deadpanned as Crosshairs chuckled and Bee choked on the thin air. It took a while for the three humans to get the joke before they started sputtering.

"I definitely don't want to kiss you guys! No offense." Tessa coughed out. Josh giggled and said, "One: I am not gay. Two: I don't think they would appreciate drool on them. Three: just no."

"Yeah let's get started." Shane awkwardly stated, Tessa put the bottle in the center of their circle.

"Oh before we go, let's have designated spinners for the Autobot's."

" _Are you saying I belong in Weenie Hut Junior's_?"

"No I'm saying you might not have enough momentum to spin." Tessa replied only to have Bee stomp over to the center of the circle and grab the bottle.

" _Super Weenie Hut Junior's?"_ He threw with all his strength and successfully managed to make the bottle spin a full circle only to smack him on the back of the helm! The scout flew forward into Tessa's lap and whined his optic collided with her jean's buttons.

" _AGH! That's my eye!_ "

"Told you." Tessa picked up the scout and passed him over to Crosshairs so the paratrooper can look for any damage, "Now since it landed on me Bee, ask me the question."

" _Why isn't the number eleven pronounced onety one?_ "

Everyone looked to one another and Shane replied, "Well where in our numbers do we have the first number match the second digit?"

"Forty-four." Cross deadpanned as he finally pushed Bee to one side with a shrug, "Got smacked. Nothin' to see here."

" _Turd or Dub?"_

"Oh God um…truth?"

" _Name a part of the woman's body which is bigger than a man's._ " Steve Harvey's voice echoed throughout the house. Shane and Josh laughed hysterically while Drift shifted uncomfortably in his spot and Crosshairs added a new dent to the scout's head.

"The chest obviously." A spin and it landed on Drift.

"Truth or Dare?"

"Truth." Drift replied, preparing himself for something very stern.

"Ok, if you were forced to, who would you marry from our group?" Tessa couldn't keep the smirk off her face as Drift looked mentally disturbed. Crosshairs walked over and snapped at Tessa, "Hey, don't make him crash! It'll make repairs more difficult for me!"

"Gomen. Crosshairs."

"Wait, what?" Cross asked clearly caught off guard. Drift looked to Tessa, "I'd choose Crosshairs." The look of disgust turned into a wicked grin from Crosshairs. He wrapped his arm around Drift's waist and purred, "So you want to go trade paint jobs after we're done with this?" Everyone laughed as Drift grabbed the paratrooper and flung him into the cat's bed, the kitten watching the little green toy sent his way. The kitten pawed at the green thing and smacked it into the plush bedding.

"Ack!" Crosshairs wheezed and Tessa went go save him as Shane spun for Drift. The bottle landed on Josh.

"Truth or Dare?"

"Dare!"

"I dare you to endure something called a mustache tickle for thirty seconds."

"What are mustache tickles?" Josh's answer was Shane scooting closer to Josh and he said, "I do it to Tessa when I want something now come here!" Drift started the timer as Shane's scruff tickled and itched Josh's bald head and face.

"AGH! MAKE IT STOP!" Josh was hysterically yelling in dismay as the weird sensations were focused on his polished bald head. Crosshairs and Tessa were stoic as she rescued the paratrooper from Toodles. When they came back, Josh spun the bottle and it landed on Tessa again.

"Truth or Dare?"

"Dare."

"Endure mustache tickles for a minute."

"Crap!" Tess shrieked as Shane wrapped his arms around the blonde and rubbed his scruff along her neck and up to her cheeks. She thrashed around at the weird sensations while everyone was laughing at the exchange with Drift acting as the timer. The noise of the door opening and closing was not heard by anyone except for Brains (who by the way wasn't invited by this group at all.) When the mustache tickle ended, Tessa's hair was everywhere with static and she elbowed Shane in the gut.

"I hate that so much!" As she spun the bottle. It landed on Shane. With an evil grin, Tessa asked, "Truth or Dare?"

"Dare." Shane did not like how Tessa's eyes went from blue of happiness to dark with revenge.

"I want you to hold still and let me do a purple nurple."

Everyone's eyes went wide and Shane closed his eyes as he turned his body towards Tessa.

"Don't blame me when we can't have sex later because of my nipples." With a hard twist, Tessa got a yell out of Shane and they were about to continue when Drift asked, "How would that work? I don't think your nipples touch Tessa unless you do it the way an animal called a dog would perform the action." Crosshairs snickered as Josh face palmed himself.

"We shouldn't even talk about this unless you want Ca-"

"WHAT THE HELL LUCKY CHARMS?!"

Everyone looked to see Cade standing behind the couch, anger imminent on his face. Crosshairs rolled his optics, "Oi! How the hell does he keep appearing? He's like what humans call a ghost."

" _I will find you and I will kill you._ "

"Shut up!"

The Autobot's could only watch as Cade hauled Shane away with Tessa and Joshua following with Cade's threats to personally neuter the Irish man himself for being a dog.


End file.
